finding footing

Robbie, me and Kitty

This was the first time I've been back to New York when it was not the dead of winter that I can remember. The weather was spectacular with just one day of all day rain just to prove it was real.

My nephews are having the kind of childhood that I remember - spending most of their time outdoors, in or around the lake and woods. The community I grew up in is little changed, still idyllic.

Patty and me at Misquamicutt Beach. RI

Poor Patty was in the middle of some viral misery, but a perfect day at the beach went a long way towards making her feel better. We found a brand new favorite beach about two hours from her house.

The visit home was complete with a visitation from my parents' spirits, still at war. Unsettling, but not all that surprising.
There was no reading, writing or stitching while I was there. It was all about observing, appreciating and remembering. Lots of remembering.

just breathe

beached

I was at the beach in RI yesterday. Brought a small bag with mending stuff and some scraps with me and let the cloth out to play in the sand.

I had thoughts of letting the tide take them away, but this is one of those public places that is very strict about littering.

Charlie's (1st) Banner Year

  Charlie turned one on the 1^st of August.

When I first committed to watching Charlie, it was mostly to keep him safe. I just can't imagine hiring someone to do the most important job in the world and I feel for the many families that have no other option. I remember Jake saying something like “He'll give me a reason to smile” or something like that.

I know I was skeptical. My first nickname for him was Grub, then Groot, which quickly became Gooby....Good Baby.

I have never been a “baby” person. Never even held one right up until the ripe age of thirty when they handed me Colin and said “Good luck!” That started the seven luckiest years of my life because Jimmy, Fate & Karma conspired to make it possible for me to stay at home with both boys. Now it's my turn to pay it all back and forward at the same time, as long as I am able.

It's been a remarkable year. Charlie has given me so much more than just a reason to smile. He's given me a reason to look to the future and I'll always be grateful to Missy & Jake for trusting me with his care.

(He had a surprise for me at 1:27)

It's the little things.

This was an interesting day that did not start out auspiciously. To quote Leonard Cohen, “I ached in the places where I used to play.” I was tempted to go back to bed and stay there, but I'd had my fill of tossing and turning so I forced myself to get up and get on with what used to be a Good Day; coffee, some eats, getting dressed and out of the house, errands and a walk in the park, followed by some pool time. It's been since the end of June since any more than two of these were possible.

I'm going to be deliberately sketchy about the first event because I was the unwitting participant of a little Robin-Hoodery. Let's just say it was one disgruntled but friendly New-Yorker doing another one a favor in a show of solidarity. And somehow I knew he was going to do it before he did it.

Then it was off to the park. I haven't walked there in weeks and I didn't realize how my writing (what writing?) had suffered for lack of thoughtful footwork. Wallowing in the pool doesn't lend itself to fresh ideas lately, just bliss, too much of which turns the brain to jelly. Ask any opium smoker. 

Less than a quarter mile in, right at a convenient stone perch in the deep shade, I got down a substantial portion of a scene that I have been avoiding since it had a name. I called it good and went to stand on the bridge and watch fish for a while because it was hot and I was out walking will.

I have been a bird watcher, a bird noticer, my whole life. Seeing an unusual bird is meaningful to me. A sign of sorts. There, in the stream, playing on a sandbar with a few flycatchers was a feathered jewel. The small bird was completely

peacock blue and just glittered in the dappled light. I only know of one bird that is so relentlessly blue, the indigo bunting, but I had never seen alive, only in pictures. I can only assume that the greenish light of the glen gave it the turquoise cast, otherwise this was an alien visitation. Tomorrow I'm going back with the good camera and see if I was crazy.